Why I write, and why I don't.

I keep forgetting that I have a blog. I usually just write in one of my many journals when I have anything worth writing. And I even write in them when I don't have anything worth writing. I journal to keep my brain from exploding. You wouldn't think by looking at me that my brain contains anything of value. But it does! I think all kinds of things! Like just last week, as I was watching the coverage of Hurricane Issac, I thought how cool it would be if you could pad up in bubble wrap and bulky road rash proof clothing and let the wind gusts see how far they could take you. See?!? That is very important stuff there! Scientific even. Here lately, my brain has been on overload. I think those scientific thoughts, thoughts about my marriage, my kids, my friends, or lack of them, my road to becoming a hermit/crazy cat lady and a slew of other important stuff and things. It's probably not that interesting to the normal human, but anyone with a crazy brain like mine would appreciate the finer workings of my warped brain. I know I have no readers, but I'll try my best to stick a post it somewhere in my head where one of my many pixies that reside in there might see it and remind me to come here and post from time to time. I'll try.

And that's what I think about that.

I completely think I should remember stuff better. It's nearly a new year and I've already forgotten stuff that I shouldn't even know yet. I don't even remember what my last post was about, but I'll go on and finish this one anyway. Catch up time! Grace, still dancing. Justin, singing some, driving none and getting taller. Piper, still giraffe crazy, more like me every day and aspires to be a werewolf someday. There. Oh...forgot about Ken. Well, we're doing great! We were able to go to Disney World 3 times this year, renewed our vows on the It's A Small World ride in March and have decided we should just live there. I love him. He loves me. We're a work in progress and it's getting better every day. We talk now. We laugh. We get along like we did when we were dating. Do we argue? Yep. Do I still have moments where I blow up for no known reason and explode into a psycho, hell bent on destroying everyone who I feel ever did me wrong? Sure do. Those episodes are becoming less frequent and far more easy to control now. I'd say we're going to be ok. I'm pretty certain of it. I'm too pretty to go to jail.
Now that I've gotten that out of the way, let me get to the point of this post. I'm upset. It's almost Christmas and people are becoming more and more stupid every day. Why is it so hard to be nice to others? Why can't people just stay out of everyone else's business and take care of their own mess? Is it such a burden to smile or say hello or tell someone to have a nice day? What's up with all the frowning? I know times are tough and money is tight. I know so many people are down on their luck, have personal trials, health issues, or sometimes, just a bad attitude in general, but smiles aren't toxic. They're easy to fake, but the real ones are better. I gave my facebook friends a challenge today, what with it being Monday and all. I told them to do or say something nice for at least one person, say hello to at least 3 strangers and smile at at least 5 people and hug a friend. Now, I don't know that anyone actually took me up on my challenge, and I didn't expect them to report back, but I know I tried it myself. I smiled at everyone I saw today at the mall. I walked up to a complete stranger, who was dressed in his Marine dress blues, and thanked him for doing what he does and wished him a Merry Christmas. I think I shocked him, but he was polite and smiled and thanked me. I felt good doing that! My mood lifted just from smiling at people and making eye contact while doing it. Every single person smiled back. And for a moment, I like to think we made a connection where we understood each other as being part of a whole. It's a big world. Smiling won't save it, but it might just make it a little easier to live here. And that's what makes me happy. Maybe my smile mattered to someone today. Maybe not. Either way, I feel a little lighter. So go smile. Do it. I dare you. :)

What's goin on? And things.

So here's what has been going on since I posted in April. I lost my job of 16 years because of "budget cuts". That is a fancy term that means, "The boss lady wasn't too fond of me because I stopped letting her and the other cronies in the "higher up" positions run over me." Let me just say that yes, I was upset over it, but no, I'm not going to sue them...even though I'm pretty sure I have a case. But that's a whole other blog. In the wake of that whole, losing the job, thing, we up and moved. It was something we had discussed, but not really in depth, and when I found out I had nothing going for me in the lovely Ford of Stan, we decided to uproot and move. We had 2 destinations in mind. 1...Orlando! Yes, boys and girls, it is a dream of mine to work in Disney World. But I had a few things holding me back. For one, I have visible tattoos. GASP! After snooping around, we discovered that good old Disney World has a few hidden stipulations in their hiring procedures. Some other things keeping us from moving there were the facts that we didn't have a support group down there in case of emergencies with the kids and the kids themselves. Although the 7 year old would LOVE to live IN Disney World, (she always says IN, not near.)the other 2 weren't too keen on the whole thing. The other destination....Somerset. Land of the free, home of the worst mall ever. Also the area where my daughter's dance team is. So, we looked at a house. (yes. A. As in 1.) and started our move. We've been here a couple of weeks and I love it so far. The kids will start school soon and that may make things more interesting, but for now, they like it too. My marriage is still on the mend. (insert AWWWWWW's here) I still have days where I'd like to hunt down the whore and scratch her cornea's and then piss in the wounds, but those are becoming less frequent. I'm learning that Hate is not the opposite of Love, and that she is not worth the effort it takes to dispise her. I'm becoming indifferent. I'm letting Karma deal with her whoring ass. That way, I stay out of jail. Ha ha. I'm moving on to a new chapter in my life. A new me. A new outlook. If you knew how bad I was with change....you'd be placing bets on how long I'll last. But please don't do that because I'm paranoid already. So wish us luck and pray I don't become an out of control dance mom. I've already started bedazzling my mom jacket. (someone should stop me.)

I shouldn't neglect this. But I do.

I have no excuse. None. I'm terrible. I accept it. Now, on to something more important...

I hate big spoons. It's true. I nearly lost my marbles the other day because my son fixed me a bowl of soup and expected me to eat with a big spoon. Looking back on it now, I see that I over reacted just a tad. I could have just gotten up and got my own spoon instead of lobbing it across the room shrieking about the evil ways of the big spoon. I apologized to my son. And to the dog.
I have been trying to be a little less crazy lately. It isn't working out too well for me. I have the brain waves of a goldfish I'm sure. I am so easily distracted I could be ADD....no H there. I'm too lazy to have the H. The only things that hold my attention longer than a minute are Facebook (yes, I'm addicted) and reading. I can get so caught up in a book that I forget to eat or sleep. Right now I'm reading the Outlander (Highlander) series by Diana Gabaldon again. I love her books. They make me want a Kilt wearing Highlander of my very own. The accent alone melts my bones, so if I ever do get to go to Scotland, I may never come back. Surely my husband would understand....maybe I can convince him to wear a kilt......nah, he could never pull off the accent.
Ok, I'm off to distract myself with something else. I've already bored myself to tears with this. Sorry.

Well, I am forgetful.

I keep meaning to remember to blog, but then I forget or someone spills something, or the dog craps in the floor and I get distracted. I'm a busy person. It isn't like anyone reads this anyway, but I shouldn't neglect it. I don't always finish what I start or start what I should or finish the things I had someone else start. I'm human.
Summer is upon us and although I'm happy to be out of school, I'm not happy about the fact that I'll have to get my air conditioner fixed....again. I'm not a fan of summer weather. I don't go swimming...this ass in a bathing suit is how I got the nickname, "Crille, the manatee." I don't do picnics....I'm not a fan of the sun or bugs. So if my air is broken, I'm useless. I'm just a puddle that whines and complains alot.
My kids are growing up on me. My son is 15...still singing, still back talking and still the greatest kid ever hatched. My 10 year old is soon to be my 11 year old. She's still dancing, still having OCD and anxiety issues that make me need medication, but she's the smartest kid I know...bookwise anyway..(she's so blonde she's almost disabled). My 5 year old will be 6 next week. She's still addicted to giraffes and I'm beginning to think she's my grandmother reincarnated. She's completely insane and so flippin funny, yet so grown up about so much. I love my kids. Duh. That's a given.
Well, I've blogged some, so I forgive myself for being lazy. Now, I have to go clean up dog poo. Yay me.

Paul Reviere didn't ride through here.

The Holiday's are coming! The Holiday's are coming!

I wish someone had warned me. Why didn't someone warn me? I haven't bought the first present, or for that matter, even THOUGHT about buying a present. I've been so stressed about my job and family crap....I haven't got a better excuse.
I hate the thought of it. Shopping makes me cringe. And the fact that I'm broker than broke doesn't help either. Think I can convince the kids that we are Jehovah Witnesses and don't do Christmas?

Yeah, me either.

And yes, I did it again.

I'm no Britney Spears, but oops, I did it again. Forgot I had a blog. I need to get my shit together. Fill in time.....
*my middle kid is currently fighting strep throat. She's winning. She just got over the swine flu 3 weeks ago so the dr's are keeping a closer eye on her, which I'm thankful for.
*the oldest one has been invited to sing at our local United Way charity dinner. I'm quite partial to his voice when he's using it to sing...but I hate it when he's using it to argue with me.
*the youngest continues to crack me up. Her latest comedic adventure was the other night when I went to the bathroom and discovered little poopies in the toilet. I commented that someone had not flushed. She was in my bed and piped up..."Yeah, that was me. First I pooped, then I peed on it. I added a little extra sauce." I wonder where she gets this stuff. She's not right in the head and I'm glad. Gives me something to laugh about.
Other than that, it's been quiet around here. I haven't gotten any new tattoos. Haven't broken anything important and haven't beaten the neighbor with a stick even though I have been tempted. I'm sure I'm due some drama soon....it's just laying in wait.